Posted August 15, 2009on:
before having May, I often find people giving up their cats or dogs lame, most of the time because they don’t say why they are giving up the animals, just “due to the arrival of the baby,” what does that suppose to mean? Then there were people who say they are giving up their animals because they do not have the time and energy to give those animals TLC as before. I did not understand that neither. People who asked me what am I going to do with the cats when I was pregnant annoyed me, because they implied that having cats = allergy causing and unsanitary.
Now I want to give up my cats. Not because they are allergy causing or unsanitary. Not because I think I don’t have time or energy to care for them the way they deserve. No, it’s because I resent them. An already took Crippled away and is now struggling in L.A. caring for that psycho cat. I have Fatty with me, and there are still days I fantasize about drugging him with tranquilizer pills to watch him pass out and remand motionless for hours. Or opening the door and tossing him outside. Or strangling him. I want to give up my cats because they are ingrates. I have pulled through sleepless nights and spent thousands of dollars on them since they were put in my charge, and in return they act like they own me. I resent that. With the arrival of the babiy, some animals rally to the cause and behave absolutely charming. Some turn into bitches and assholes My cats, unfortunately, fall into the 2nd category. Fatty wants attention – fine, I’ll try to give what I’ve got, but don’t scream at me after I have already fed you a sizeable amount, don’t fuck with the automatic feeder once you’re done eating, don’t scream AGAIN at midnight for no reason. Don’t hump the fucking bathrag and then scream in ecstasy. At least shut the hell up. Don’t eat the baby’s vaseline. I resent having to deal with all this crap. Especially the meowing part.
I think once May’s sleeping habits improve, I can slowly incorporate the cat back into every moment of our lives again, including having him on our bed. Maybe I’ll be done with resenting him and might love him again. I have been so disappointed with their behavior. It might be unreasonable, but I expect them to prove their worth when I count on them to help me out. They failed me.