i know what you mean!

another playdate today

Posted on: November 21, 2010

… with KC and AK. I swear May must have known ma. Ti’m in her last life, intimately, even. As soon as I mentioned “Di` Die^~m” her eyes grew bright and she would repeat “di` Diem” (pronounced yi yiem) so carefully and tenderly. Witness: she was eating her prized slice of steamed fish cake (the japanese ones, you know what i mean) last night. I was asking for it, she shook her head and said, “May.” Could Nana have some? “May.” Could XYZ have some? “May.” Then we started talking about Sunday’s outing and suddenly she offered her slice to di Diem, SO MANY TIMES, so readily. It was the sweetest thing to witness, as I saw that May fully understood the meaning of her gesture and was emotionally vested in it. What have these two been in their last life???

And, funny, she kept on saying “em Khang” very clearly. I said “anh Khang” (anh = older, em = younger) only to hear her repeated “em Khang, em Khang” ha ha.

Today’s outing is slated to be California Academy of Science. I totally didn’t think of it but thanks to ma. Ti’m’s greatness, we are going. I even managed to find a $5 coupon code, it’s 900050, if you want to go. I booked via their website and will just retrieve my tickets at their kiosk. I also got AK an xmas present. Buying presents for all the little girls and boys I know is sort of tricky, since I’m a rather spontaneous gift giver. I also try hard not to clutter my friends’ houses with unnecessary objects, hence I might give one year but not the next if I can’t think of anything of use. But, I did find a suitable gift for AK this year, and that is a light weight rain suit. This kid must have recently turned human from being some sort of amphibian or other water creature in his last life. I witnessed him soaking wet the last time we were at Habitots, he was just glued to the water table and nothing else could entice him to leave. Then he threw up and caught a cold on the way home. Ma. Ti’m was so bummed. I spent hours looking up on these rain suits and found one that is reasonably priced and matches what I had in mind. So, I’m happy. Hopefully AK can get back to his water playing activities with this item without catching a cold, and ma. Ti’m can feel less guilty.

We are enjoying our stay here in Berkeley immensely. Jim and Helen just give us the run of the house, I cook and eat whenever, clean up my own mess, and have lots of freedom for May in general. May is taking the full advantage of having a Nana, and can be seen turning to Nana with phrases like, “Nana, cracker, tho?” (after futile attempts directed at me in the morning re: bunny crackers before breakfast), “Nana, ke.o” (chocolate candy), etc., etc.. She’s now speaking like Maika: “oat-meal” “Gi-na” (the cat), “ca^’t – ddi” (put away), “ddi – ngu?” (go to sleep), “ba’c – An” etc. etc.. And can follow more complex command such as “May, go into our bedroom, find your kitty slippers and bring them out here.” This is very helpful as she finds these commands amusing and is willing to follow them, so when I want to redirect her activities, I often use it. I try to reward her by showing her something interesting or doing something fun with whatever I have asked her to bring me, just so she associate positive consequences with following my direction.

I have not implemented time out with May yet, and so far there has not been an incident where she could use one. So far redirection has worked well for me, and if not, I just let her cry for a bit, and then offer a hug, and then redirection, and then we talk about it when she’s calm. I am just not good at giving time out, and for some reason, my gut tells me that it’s not part of me at this point, so I have not tried. I think it’s because I’m a SAHM with enough luxury of time and energy to do things my way. I can imagine this not working if I were a single mom or working mom or with multiple kids. We’ll just have to see.

As May is developing her independence, I try to give her alternatives when I don’t want her to do something, just to avoid hearing too much protest, let’s not kick that, kick this instead (more later


2 Responses to "another playdate today"

time out general rule is minute = years of age, ie 1 min for a 1 yo babe.
me no use it 🙂 altho sometimes when K chooses to scream instead of telling me how she feels, I’d tell her I don’t want to hear loud noises, but if it helps her feel better, she can go into the bathroom/separate room, scream all she might, then come back to tell me when she’s calm 🙂
turns out our disciplinary often agrees, scratch the letting babies cry for hours fact 😉

KC moi goi phone ke cho Ata ve buoi ddi choi hom qua ddo. Ke Tia Lia luon :). Con Ntl thi coi hinh cu la ca-fish kg ha.
Can’t wait for the rainsuit to arrive!!! From Now til then chi ddem no ddi toi noi kg ro mo water dduoc.
May voi chi nhu zen voi Kc 🙂

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