i know what you mean!

part 2 of last post

Posted on: November 23, 2010

Oh man, May is sleeping less when we are travelling like this, so staying up this late to blog is costing me my youth and beauty.

Back to what I was saying in the last post. I find offering alternatives to May very helpful at this stage where she is more inclined to say “no” and get pissed off if she can’t have her way. I like to mess with her mind for my own amusement, though maybe I should quit it. I don’t know. I’m kind of on the fence about this, because, come on, I don’t get to have much “fun” these days, if you know what I mean. I used to mess with Donna at work and that totally made my day. Picking on Juk was fun too. Now I only have May, so excuse while I laugh at her.. Compared to what I did to Juk, I’m saying May is getting it very easy. For example, when May shakes her head too much, I cheerfully say “MAY, SHAKE YOUR HEAD, DO IT DO IT DO IT NOW! SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE THAT HEAD!!!! I WANT YOU TO SHAKE YOUR HEAD FOR ME!!” And then May’s head would come to a screeching halt, I could see her thinking, and then her eyes screw up and she would let out an “AH!!” to express her annoyance. She wanted to disagree with me but couldn’t figure out how, ha ha. Another time, when we were on the plane, I needed her to nurse but she kept on popping off the boob and exposing me – not cool – so I said, “May, no more nursing, done, bye bye boobies!” May immediately clung tightly to me and said “bu’ bu’ bu’!!” and guess who stay latched for a while afterward, heh heh. OK I know I can’t abuse this, because I can’t tell her that I tolerate/encourage her to contradict me. But I like the “ha, gotcha!” sense of satisfaction from outwitting a 1 year old.

She’s pretty fun right now, so maybe I’ll quit it. She’s trying out her wits too, and the result is often amusing. For example, thought Helen sticks firmly to my rules, May still tests her luck with her Nana when she can’t get what she wants from me.
“Nana, ke.o” (candy)
“nana, cracker”
“Nana, coi” (watch youtube)

She’s also pulling out her trump card left and right, just to fine tune it, I guess. Whenever she wants something, she has figured out that I tend to pay attention to her hunger and her sleep. So, when she’s determined to go somewhere or get something, she would say “ddo’i ” (hungry).
May: đi… xuống, mẹ (she wanted me to go downstairs with her)
me: May, mẹ ngồi trên lầu, mẹ bận, con xuống 1 mình coi chừng té đau đó (told her i’m not going, if she goes down by herself, she might fall and get hurt)
May: xuống ! xuống ! mẹ !
me: (ignoring her)
May: xuống! xuống! … đói ! đói !
me: đói hả ? muống xuống ăn dinner hả (want to go down and eat dinner?)
May: uh, đói, đói, xuống!
me: con muốn ăn gì ? (what would you like to eat?)
May: kẹo! đói ! (candy)

When she’s really frantic and wants my comfort, she says “nằm” (to lie down, meaning go to bed). I guess she figures out that for sure I don’t leave her when she goes to sleep, whereas if she asks to be held or to be picked up, I would soon put her down again.

Speaking of which, I tried to take her into the old work place again this morning, and the same thing happened. Though we had a talk and May tried really really hard to listen to me, e.g. when we got into the building, she knew where she was and she worked really hard to not cry, by the time I finished chatting with the first person, May’s voice was cracking when she said “bye bye” and her eyes were red. Then Donna entered the room and May just bursted into tears, saying “nằm, nằm, đi về ! đi về!” (go home). I bribed the kid with a dumdum pop which really surprised Donna, because she thought I wouldn’t feed May junks – I have not given her things like dumdum pops until today! Sucking on that dumdum wasn’t good enough to calm May, so I tried the M&M next, and May liked them too, except she couldn’t get comfortable and would burst into tears form time to time, pleading to leave in between. Loy was saying, “Oh God, I don’t want to make her cry when she sees me…” Well, it’s not the people! As soon as we left the building with Loy, May perked up and started to interact. She even let Loy hold her while she sat in Loy’s lap in the restaurant. She agreed to have Loy carry her for a while after our lunch all the way back to the building. I think it’s probably the energy in that building. The has been so much pay cuts and fees increases and lay offs and general discontentment in that building, May’s baby radar must have picked up and amplified. She has not behaved like that anywhere else.

I think this kid is left handed. She has been favoring that hand for quite a long time now. Sometimes when she uses the right hand, I’ve noticed that she would be more clumsy. She has succeeded in taking off the shoe on the right foot using the left hand, but has not been able to remove the shoe on the left foot using her right hand, for example. It doesn’t concern me much, as I see that Son’s sister can do just fine with her left handedness and has not really experienced disadvantages. In my family, May’s in good company, as we have amassed quite a crowd of left handed members.

One last thing for this entry: Jim is now the most desired person in this household, maybe ties with the ever elusive Gina the cat. Gina the cat has passed into old age in the company of Jim and Helen, never subjected to the antics of little people. As the result, Gina views little people as the enemy and would scurry off as soon as she sees one. May has been here for nearly a week, and has only caught a few glimpses of this cat whose existence seems to be suggested everywhere around the house, but not really experienced. It’s Gina food, and Gina’s water, and Gina’s tuna dish, and Gina’s special treats, but THE Gina is nowhere to be seen. I see May standing in front of the water bowl and food dish at least 3x/day contemplating the meaning of them. She’s willing to drop everything when she catches a glimpse of that cat and has a good lead as to where Gina’s heading. But so far, no luck.

Jim, on the other hand, does not actively try to avoid May. It’s just that he didn’t sign on to be Poppa Jim along with Nana Helen. He’s just plain Jim, who does not entertain toddlers, who does not coo to babies nor take interests in activities of a 19 month old. He does, however, guards the stairway and would install himself at the top or bottom of it if May is there, because he worries for her safety, hee hee. He talks to children the same way he talks to adults, extending the same courtesies and regards. He ignores them the same way he ignores adults. That adds up to irresistable attraction on May’s part. To be fair, I think Jim’s type will always attract social little girls, because they would seek to impress the one who does not fawn over them. Anyhow. May is seen these days performing all her tricks with an eye on Jim, to see if he’s looking. If he is not, she asks that he does (ha ha). If she goofs and we laugh, but Jim hasn’t, May requests that Jim laugh too (ha ha). If telling her something belongs to Jim or of Jim’s interest, I would get her attention. She’s not like this with Son, probably because Son’s always chasing after her and pleading for her to stay with him and watch him perform tricks 🙂


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happenings right now


November 2010
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